The one single most brilliant piece information I received in counseling was from a therapist who had served as a former Special Forces psychologist. He and I had been through many sessions, and one day he asked me why I was so frustrated. I pulled out a piece of paper with a list of all the actions I was doing on how to treat PTSD, trauma, loss and grief. I stated I was doing all of them and this %$#^& just isn’t going away. I asked him, “How do I get rid of them and when will they go away?”
He kind of smiled and I am sure chuckled inside at my focused, driven, over-achieving need to control the outcome. He told me PTSD, trauma, loss and grief were never going to go away, but learning to deal with them in a healthy way can allow me to live a more normal life. I just sat there and thought wow, now that is a revelatory dose of reality. OK, the key was learning to deal with them, not try and eliminate them, but now what?
As I went through a spiritual transformation and began to experience healing of Spirit, Mind and Body at a Soul level, I developed a deeper understanding of what was behind symptoms like anxiety, anxiousness, hypervigilance, fear, agitation, irritability, hostility, etc.
Instead of fighting them, battling them, or letting them take control over me, I simply acknowledge them, invite them in and thank them for being there. Then I sit with them for a while and ask, “Why are you here today?” Once I figure out what triggered them, I thank them for showing up to teach me a lesson that day so I can live a healthier life. (Tip: I learned to treat them as a life and Soul coach who shows up to help me learn, change and transform)
Then, I take them on a date. I invite the symptom to go on a walk, a bike ride, have a smoothie or even run errands with me. I pretend they are a real being, and I play the role of the symptom too as we have a great engaging conversation. It will seem a little strange at first, but if you really get into playing the symptom’s role, you will be totally amazed at what comes from the conversation. Once I truly understand why the symptom showed up, what I needed to learn and the benefit to me for having the experience, I thank it for going on a date, wish them a great day and then……just let it go.
Then, as a finale, I play the song “Let it Go” from the Disney movie “Frozen. At the end of the song where she sings “the cold doesn’t bother me anyway”, I substitute and sing the “symptom” for the word “cold” such as, “anxiety doesn’t bother me anyway.”
I know some of you think I’m crazy for doing this, but I say, we are crazy for letting the symptoms take over us, become us and ruin our day.
Now, I will recommend you don’t try this in a crowded area because when you are having a conversation with an imaginary symptom, people get nervous. But, when someone does ask what you’re doing, just laugh, smile, and tell them the truth. Their reaction is often surprising as many will respond with “what a great idea.”
You can also journal the date and conversation instead, but talking it out and really getting into the role of the symptom is quite revealing. This is your chance to make the symptom “best supporting actor/actress.”
Long-term outcome: If you do this often enough, the dates become less important and you gain the capacity to go through this process quickly in your mind. Over time, the symptoms will show up less frequently, with less intensity, and eventually you will have the ability to understand and cope with the trigger and symptoms on the spot.
Tip: Although this is a Mind-Body technique for now, when you go through the 7 Step Spiritual Transformation process and can add in an understanding on a Soul level, it’s a total game changer. The trifecta approach using Spirit, Mind and Body understanding and application will set you free.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Exercise: The next time a symptom shows up; invite it in, thank it for showing up, ask why they are there, take it on a date, have a great conversation, understand what you learned and how to apply to your life, then just let it go.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
